I have been caring for my mother full time now since my father passed unexpectedly in May of 2016. Before that I was more of a watcher over; she and my Dad took care of each other. She moved in with me after he passed and has steadily declined these past years.
I would say one of the hardest things is the role reversal. She went from being my mom to like a child that I care for. She calls me “mom.” Or rather, she did call me mom. She doesn’t speak much anymore and what she does say does not make much sense.
Hospice is on board now. I have left work on family leave until she passes. I’m doing this with the support of my 22-year-old son. I can’t say enough good things about him and his care for his grandma. Up until today, she would perk up at the sound of his voice.
There is not much time left with my momma. I just want her at peace. My favorite memory of my mom is the time she took me on my first roller coaster ride….it was at night at Six Flags Magic Mountain. It was so fun.
My advice is to go with the flow and to remember that the brain is the diseased part, not the heart or soul.
Get support from local groups. Think about donating not only money but tissues! I am donating my mom’s brain to further research. It can’t help her but maybe it will help me or my son. Alzheimer’s is not just a disease that robs the memories, it robs the whole entire life of the person.